Ithink we all have unhealthy psychological habits, some of which somepeople are aware of more than others. Those people who have attemptedto change unhealthy psychological habits know how difficult it can beto do so. In addition, unhealthy psychological habits are extremelyperilous to our emotional and healthy well-being. However, I am moreconcerned about my friend’s unhealthy habits: Jaime distancinghimself when he feels guilty instead of restoring relationship,Christine being critical when her self-esteem is low, and Dawson‘psyching himself out’ after a failure.
Mostsignificantly, I have noted with much concern that Jaime’spsychological habits are affecting him emotionally and healthywell-being. Jaime has a habit of distancing himself when he feelsguilty of breaking up a relationship with his girl friend. His guiltfrequently arises when he intends to do something that may cause harmto others. I have witnessed this myself when I met Jaime so depressedin isolation, and forced me away claiming that he wanted to stayalone. He was staring at the wall before him like a cartooncharacter. I tried to convince him that I can help him out of thatsituation, but declined my offer immediately. In order to ease hisguilt, however, I encouraged him to take corrective actions byapologizing to her girl friend as this repairs damaged relationship.Research indicated that apologies typically repair brokenrelationships as they help an individual to garner authenticforgiveness from the aggrieved parties (Walker123).
Additionally,Christine, who is one of my closest friends, undergoes the commonestand most harmful psychological habit of engaging into negativeself-talk when her self-esteem is low. She frequently responds torejection and other blows to her self-worth with an intrinsic innerdialogue that is harsh, abusive, and even punitive in nature. Sherationalize this vicious assault on her self-esteem by telling herinner self that she ‘desert it’ or that she is just ‘preparing’herself for future disappointments. And yet, annihilating herconfidence and demolishing her self-worth only crafts it to appearexponentially more challenging for her to succeed and inquintessence, establishes a self-fulfilling prophesy. The bestapproach to avoid future self-rejection and other similar habits toher self-worth is to nurse her self-esteem back to normal when it ishurting instead of stomping it into the ground (Graham196).
Anotherunhealthy psychological habit is exhibited by Dawson, another closefriend. He has a habit of ‘psyching himself out’ after a failurein his exams. I have observed that Dawson responds to his own failureby convincing himself that although he has tried, his goal isimpossible to accomplish and that his chances of doing so is limitedin a way or two. He was justifying his failure as though he waspredestined to fail. Furthermore, he just believes that he is justbeing ‘realistic’ and, therefore, it is prudent to lower hisexpectation to merely avoid the predestined disappointment to come.Conversely, I believe that such thoughts are neither prudent nor‘realistic’ as people only succumb to the long-lastingdistortions that are initiated by their own failure. Furthermore, Ihave come to understanding that rather than pandering to suchunhealthy psychological habit, I require a positive mindset and anopen mind pertinent to analyzing my failure and identifying all myareas of weakness so that I can devise a plan to strengthen my futureaccomplishments (Arthur 10).
Conclusively,with opened eyes to the rationalizations that help to contain suchunhealthy psychological habits, people are in position of challengethem in good time, and replacing them with healthy psychologicalhabits that promote emotional and healthy resilience. Some of friendsuphold maladaptive psychological habits because they are able toconvince themselves that they benefit them.
Arthur,Herzog III. Howto Write Almost Anything Better and Faster.Language Arts & Disciplines, 2006.
Graham,Hermine L. Cognitive-behaviouralIntegrated Treatment (c-Bit): A Treatment Manual for Substance Misusein People with Severe Mental Health Problems.Chichester: John Wiley & Sons, 2003. Internet resource.
Walker,Lewis. Persuasionin Clinical Practice: Helping People Make Changes.Oxford: Radcliffe Pub, 2010. Print.